she wants to name
so no matter where they are
they'll still share one
By ZeroSometimes she thinks about math.
She wonders if there's an equation for her depression.
The number of times you cut yourself today squared,
minus the unhealed wounds from the day before
by the number of days this week you felt pretty.
The total meals you threw up in the last month
multiplied by the pounds you didn't starve off
by the number of times you told the truth about it.
The mean of the slurs hurled at you by strangers
and the ones flung by friends
by the number of people you know who love you.
She was never good at math.
She forgets you can't divide by zero.
the pills don't workA few weeks ago
my doctor called me
"You have a
with the tendencies of an insomniacthe loneliest part of her day
is going to sleep
knowing when she wakes up
she'll still be
She called me Ma'am. He called me Miss.The bank called today, trying to sell you life insurance. You let them babble because it's their job and you couldn't get a word in edgewise and you're too polite to simply hang up. When the woman on the other line finishes her spiel you tell her you're not interested, but she insists so you listen. Letting her speak for another minute couldn't hurt, right?
She starts telling you how you should be prepared in the case of a sudden death. Car crashes, drowning, equipment malfunction, cancer, disease contracted overseas, covered. You aren't going to buy this insurance but you want to ask if suicide was covered under it anyway.
But you weren't planning on dying. Not today, anyway. Not for a while. You stopped that.
She transfers you to another associate. You tell him he's wasting his time, because you simply aren't interested and don't have the need for this program.
He lists off some statistics. The number of people who die in accidents every year. What the average funeral costs in Canada
it was cold when I woke upI long to trace invisible trails
across your face, like wind
I yearn to feel your heartbeat
cuddled up against your chest
I crave all of your kisses
I ache to give you mine
Wishing upon a falling star
I'll sing you lullabies
Ninety-EightI want you here on my darkest nights
when razor blades can't scare the frights
and scars aren't enough to face my fears
haunting, taunting all of these years
I want you here on my brightest days
when sun shines dim under my rays
and our laughter comes in fits and starts
prancing, dancing never apart
I want you here for everything
The good and bad, the in between
You're HomeThe only place I know I'm safe
Is someplace I may never be
If home is where the heart is
I'm still living overseas
Red PenShe has a red pen, holds it close
Reminded of a boy
She plays with it but not his heart
A heart is not a toy
Sometimes she writes and stops herself
Afraid, for ink runs dry
Superstitious mind, she reasons
Red pens, like love, can die
She saves the pen, saving the ink
Never once she forgets
By losing it she loses him
Her heart is in his debt
JacketI curl up in the jacket you let me borrow.
It's a little too big and it smells like you.
The cold outside nips at the tips of my fingers
And sends shivers through my feet,
But my mind is warm,
Since the jacket is knitted with your embrace.
The aroma surrounds me.
Eventually I stop noticing
Because the scent blends with mine.
I can feel the cloth that has touched your skin
Connect to mine,
Sending warm flames throughout me.
This jacket holds the love you whisper in my ears.
It keeps a piece of you near me when the wind blows too cold,
And all I can do is shake without it.
This is the piece you gave of you.
The piece encompassing my soul,
I will send to you.
The sun and the dark lake
sinister lakes in my heart,
barren shores and poisonous soil,
what was happiness once is gone,
lies in ruins,
thick clouds cover the lakes,
silver mist lies on the rivers,
hides the stars,
the pale starlight can't penetrate
the shroud of doubts,
I miss you,
you were the sun,
and you turned away,
those dark waters were not for you,
before I had the chance to ask you
to shine on them,
so that they can be clear once more.
dawn is mirrored duskdawn.
imitate initiative intimate replica;
this aligned likeness brings fermata,
parallel and geometric,
it's the cliche that she completes
my shaped equation
like crescent moons
turned over one eye,
and it is from birdseye view
that we witness
a culmination of one.
echo beginnings, penetrating model;
these coordinates complementary,
equidistant and collateral
it's the truism that i finished
her sum of contours
like puzzle pieces
that you can only see
clearly from the right angle,
until each component
Nights Fail To Turn To Better Days....Wasting the night away with a bottle of scotch and that song you used to play,
Drinking for mentalities sake, try to forget but these thoughts refuse to go away and
I regret every word I said to hurt you, but you've gotta know so long thats
what you did to me and I endured you.
Because I loved you, because I needed you.
And even after all those words my heart will admit that I still do.
As you lie to my face to try and cover up what you wont explain.
I'm sorry for every yell of hate and every accusation I placed blame,
Cause you're like me, just trying to hold on and it drives us insane.
When there was never any way,
And I know I'm the one to blame,
I cant get my head straight and lifes playing us both like a head game.
Where you refuse to believe anything than what they tell you to your face and I'm drowning in
the depths of the truth they neglect to say.
Or maybe we're both in the same place.
Do you see what I see and hear as I hear?
Even though it might be different and we
Loving A Vampiress...Sweetie, I knew that we were meant to be,
but I was never meant to be your snack.
I do not enjoy having your teeth in my neck
whenever you get a taste for my AB-positive.
I hate it that you cannot stand my lasangna...
even though I stopped using garlic long ago.
And when your nails scratch my back in love,
why do I feel you giving those trails soul-kisses?
Still, I know you love me...else I would be dead.
And the loving we share is something special.
You have a taste for far more than my blood...
and, yes, you know how to keep your human happy.
So as we lay here under the full moon, tell me true...
are you as happy with me as I am with you, my dear?
Don't answer with words, but your sweet kisses...
and keep them bloody fangs out of my neck, please!
Hill of MemoriesFor example, if we could go back
To that place that we had gone to together
How starry the sky had been that night
Before we lost our love.
Oh, what a lonely dream that has woken me up at 3 am at night
Stuffing my worries into my coat pocket, I ran out into the cold
Running under the stars that I usually avoided looking at for some reason,
I arrived at that old hill
Oh, how this confuses me so!
I'm not supposed to think about you anymore
So why does my chest hurt?
I'm the one who broke off our relationship
The stars are so pretty tonight, I wonder if you're looking at them too
They seem to spin in time with my self-conflict
The starry sky is falling
Down into my dazzled eyes
In this perfectly clear winter sky
My sighs saturate the air
I still remember the warmth of those hands
That held mine
But that day seems to grow darker in my memories
And disappear into my heart
I had already ended it a long time ago, it just took time for me to admit it to you
Even though I'm