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By ZeroSometimes she thinks about math.
She wonders if there's an equation for her depression.
The number of times you cut yourself today squared,
minus the unhealed wounds from the day before
by the number of days this week you felt pretty.
The total meals you threw up in the last month
multiplied by the pounds you didn't starve off
by the number of times you told the truth about it.
The mean of the slurs hurled at you by strangers
and the ones flung by friends
by the number of people you know who love you.
She was never good at math.
She forgets you can't divide by zero.
the pills don't workA few weeks ago
my doctor called me
"You have a
with the tendencies of an insomniacthe loneliest part of her day
is going to sleep
knowing when she wakes up
she'll still be
She called me Ma'am. He called me Miss.The bank called today, trying to sell you life insurance. You let them babble because it's their job and you couldn't get a word in edgewise and you're too polite to simply hang up. When the woman on the other line finishes her spiel you tell her you're not interested, but she insists so you listen. Letting her speak for another minute couldn't hurt, right?
She starts telling you how you should be prepared in the case of a sudden death. Car crashes, drowning, equipment malfunction, cancer, disease contracted overseas, covered. You aren't going to buy this insurance but you want to ask if suicide was covered under it anyway.
But you weren't planning on dying. Not today, anyway. Not for a while. You stopped that.
She transfers you to another associate. You tell him he's wasting his time, because you simply aren't interested and don't have the need for this program.
He lists off some statistics. The number of people who die in accidents every year. What the average funeral costs in Canada
it was cold when I woke upI long to trace invisible trails
across your face, like wind
I yearn to feel your heartbeat
cuddled up against your chest
I crave all of your kisses
I ache to give you mine
Wishing upon a falling star
I'll sing you lullabies
Ninety-EightI want you here on my darkest nights
when razor blades can't scare the frights
and scars aren't enough to face my fears
haunting, taunting all of these years
I want you here on my brightest days
when sun shines dim under my rays
and our laughter comes in fits and starts
prancing, dancing never apart
I want you here for everything
The good and bad, the in between
You're HomeThe only place I know I'm safe
Is someplace I may never be
If home is where the heart is
I'm still living overseas
Red PenShe has a red pen, holds it close
Reminded of a boy
She plays with it but not his heart
A heart is not a toy
Sometimes she writes and stops herself
Afraid, for ink runs dry
Superstitious mind, she reasons
Red pens, like love, can die
She saves the pen, saving the ink
Never once she forgets
By losing it she loses him
Her heart is in his debt
i have forgotten how to forgive myselfdo you remember?
i was the first to
show you the shape of your
i carved my
initials into your
pericardium and left
your chest gaping.
you, a fish out of water,
your soft belly exposed to
i left you
drowning in love for
At NightWe float about
on light and airy clothing
skin-toned in the starlight,
flying away from the dawn,
Never quite getting away.
At His SideAt His Side
Dictated by Puabi
Nowhere better to be
Nobody warmer to love
Nothing better to do
Than to be at his side
Night and day
Who I NeededI put my faith in you
Like I knew all along I was wrong to do.
I guess when something seems too good to be true
I should heed all the signs and get out.
I think in my loneliness
I needed you.
I thought I did, anyway.
I'd never felt worthy of anything but the barest of affections,
And you taught me that I deserved more.
But then you became just like him
And the one before
And the one before that.
You took me for granted,
As I waited for each scrap of attention.
And it was bedlam,
A war in my mind
And against my heart.
I'm not even sure to this day which was on which side.
Because I knew I deserved better,
You taught me that,
But in that teaching you'd always seemed to care,
And I began to not know up from down,
So I kept silent.
If I never acknowledged it, it wasn't true.
But eventually I realized I couldn't go on in that way,
Who had saved me in so many ways,
Were killing me.
It was slowly, but it was surely.
And still, I'd hoped I was wrong,
Prayed to whoever would listen to
The Conversation, Part IThere’s just this one thing I know –
And so I want you to believe this,
That this is for real – I really mean it
When I say that I love you, need you;
I mean that you’re the best thing
to ever happen to me, honestly.
It’s ridiculous, but I have to be
Completely open in these confessions,
That being around you gets me high
And not just from the pills we take,
the cigarettes we smoke,
But your presence is enough to
Make my day when I’m messed up.
Let’s go out and become intoxicated,
Spend the evening walking city streets,
So I can tell you under darkness
All the things I can’t say in daylight,
Because the nights feel like a dream
when you’re making me want you
With just a look, not even any words.
Maybe I knew it from the start –
Something tells me I almost predicted it;
When you told me you can’t stand bullshit,
That you’re interested and won’t lie,
When you call me silk-lips and ask me
Dream Last NightI had a dream last night.
You were in my arms,
Holding me tight,
With that settled, happy stare
In your eyes
That makes me feel at home.
I had a dream last night,
And I didn't feel like dying.
Blood Lust (creepy pasta fan fiction! love pt 1)One day a girl named Hannah was walking home with her youngest brother Jake. They walked around town trying to find a quicker way home, but ended up getting lost.
"I knew listening to you wouldn't help!"
Jake yelled at Hannah tears streaming down his cheeks. She walked over to her little brother and hugged him tightly.
"Sh.... Jake, we will find our way home I promise you..."
In reality she knew they would never find their way home. He smiles as she wipes his tears away and hugs her tightly.
"Now come on Jake we better get moving, it's suppose to get below freezing by midnight."
She says a worried look in her eyes. He nods ad holds her hand tightly as they keep walking. They end up walking through the woods by midnight they find a mansion as they shiver. Hannah walks up to the mansion and knocks on the front door politely calling out.
She calls out shivering as the front door opens and a Blonde haired guy opens it. He looks at Hannah and Jake and rudely asks.
"What the f
PeaceHis has grazed over my skin,
And gave me chills
He was loving to the core,
And he was mine,
And I was his
He pinned me under neith,
Kissing the hidden feilds of skin
My besrth got shallow
His grin lashed across my skin
His warm lips were silk
One hand of his rested on my cheek,
The other on the curve of my waist
I could feel my breath catch in my throat
His mussel pressed against my tiny body
I could feel my close being slide off
He licked the shell of my ear
My breath caught
My cloths disappeared, as his did
I couldn't think,
My head was working at a million miles,
All I wanted was him
He was the joy of my day,
Hope to my night
And the love of my life
This was right
He was my future,
My greatest goal in the game of life
His hands glided like air over my stomach
His lips kissed ever inch of my face
His love guided me to my dreams
He was perfect
An angle from Heaven
I set my small hands on his warm,
His eyes twinkled like stars
His lips m
Why the Caged Bird SingsWhy the Caged Bird Sings
The world is just like a faint panorama;
The grating suppresses every part of the nomadic soul.
Of the craziness that they live through, unbound:
Lost inside the painful boundary line.
A feeble urge rises to break the rules.
A moist dream to roam again through the endless void,
Of the cloudy sky.
To feel itself again a part of the old, flourishing blue;
That once kept its busy wings clean.
With no other way to live the dreams it dreamt,
The gloomy bird blows the air through its throat.
And through the larynx, when it rushes aboard,
It lets the whistle out.
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More